Hottest Hot Sauces

With only seven ingredients, this sauce is a traditionalist's dream. A little bit smoky from the hand roasted habanero peppers and the heat of the infamous ghost pepper. Your taste buds will be crying as they try to fight off this evil intrusion!!

The heat from Scorpion Hot Sauce will paralyze you. But that is only to start. Once the shock wears off, you are in for much, much worse. At least the pain and suffering it delivers will only be temporary. You hope. And, just like the crippling venom of a real scorpion strike, this sauce could cause severe cramps, blurred vision, hypersalivation, difficulty swallowing and agitation, but luckily it is not lifethreathening…this time anyhow. Did we also mention that this sauce rocks you like a hurricane?

Smack My Ass and Call me Sally - Chet's gone mad! - Chet was ready to enjoy some barbecue that he slow cooked all day long. He knew the neighborhood rumors about Sally and how she loved giving food away to the less fortunate, or so she said. Somehow though, the starving kids in Africa seemed to stay skinny while Sally kept getting bigger. Chet wondered why that was, until he saw Ms. Struthers make off with his barbecue. For just pennies a day, you too can get the barbecue that was tasty enough to steal from the hands of Ethiopians.

Submission Bound & Gagged Hot Sauce is only for the very freakiest. No faint of heart, passive pussies, but real hardcore sauce whores. If you are a freak nasty, then you are bound to want to try this sauce. While it might make others gag, you are ready and willing to be gagged by it. You like the feeling of relinquishing your power to someone else. You better hope they know when to stop before things get out of hand.

Hasta la vista tastebuds! Tastebud Terminator hot sauce will terminate your ability to taste anything temporarily. You will probably "be back" to taste more and more of it, even if you know that it might be bad for the future of the human race. One taste of this, and you risk wiping out mankind like a nuclear bomb. This sauce is so good, it might drive you nuts. Better start working out like Linda Hamilton, in case you need to break out of the looney bin to get more sauce!

The Beast Hot Sauce - Being brave enough to try this beast is a thing of pure beauty, but you might get pretty darn ugly when you are trying it. Make sure to warn your parents and children about the awful curse words that might spurt out. Then, apologize to your spouse when it is time to be trapped in the covers with you. Those sheets will be a-flapping tonight! Better keep some aerosol air freshener next to the bed!

We should rinse our dirty, nasty potty mouths out with soap even after just uttering the $@%&!#* name. And it would not burn as much as even a fraction of this sauce would. Though you will likely never see The Hottest F@*!kin Sauce on the shelves of your local grocer, we are pretty sure that if it was there, it would have sold out instantly. That is simply because it lives up to every word of its name.

Of course, our source is confidential and we will help protect it, lest someone try to copy the unique taste, but one drop of The Source Hot Sauce on the tongue reveals its not so secret secret. It is one hot mother of a sauce little kiddies, and it could punch you with its fiery fist! This sauce is like the core of the earth itself. All liquid hot magma bubbling up and exploding out of any orifice it can.

With a taste of Toxic Waste Hot Sauce on your lips, you are on a ride, it is toxic, and you are definitely going to be slipping under. Watch out! What comes out of your holie once it has passed through is even more toxic. Woof! You better walk out back and air out a minute! You might even want to have a gas mask handy and have the bomb squad on your number one speed dial.

Just how good of a friend are you? Would you be as kind as to suck the venom out of a buddy's butt? Especially if their butt was big, pimply and stinky? Hell no, you say? Neither would we. Gross! Luckily, this is venom for which time is the only antidote, even if the burning and swelling feel like the strike of a python. Anyone who is struck by Venom Hot Sauce can just go ahead and kiss their own ass goodbye!

Vicious Viper Hot Sauce might make your neck swell up to three times it size. We will not lie. This sauce could make you scarier than a snake. If you ever wanted to get back at some high school bullies, swig some of this sauce and scare the bejesus out of them. We think they will probably cry and beg for mercy and apologize for giving you a swirly. Just be cognizant that the sauce on your breath could be venomous to others.

Wanza is a witchy woman indeed. This brew she has cooked up will cast a pooping spell on you! You will double double over with the toil and trouble Wanza's Wicked Temptation Hot Sauce causes your innards. But the wicked taste is enough to make you abandon all caution. You definitely will not cook up barbecue without having this sauce in your cauldron. And do not fear, we do not put eye of newt in this sauce. If you like that type of thing, then the ball is in your court.

This is the Belle Gunness of hot sauce. We are not sure if you know anything about Belle, but she killed off her husband and every other suitor she duped into traveling to meet her. Belle was ruthless and cunning, just like this murderous sauce. We might suggest that you sleep with one eye open. Widow - No Survivors Hot Sauce could wait until you have let your guard down, then rear its ugly head. At least we can tell you one thing, you won't get duped by this sauce! It is genuinely seeking companionship and doesn't mean it if it puts you in danger.

It will take a lot more than a few good men to help you to your feet after you try You Can't Handle This Hot Sauce. And just like Jack Nicholson, this sauce is a little shade of crazy. Okay, its shade of crazy is pretty deep. This sauce will give you that crazed look in your eye. All work and no fun makes you a dull boy, all work and none of this sauce will be a lot worse to the psyche.

Z Beyond Nothing Hot Sauce is a lot like Paris Hilton. Flashy yet coy. And in some respects you could say it reflects the Simple Life, but unlike Ms. Hilton, this sauce isn't a simpleton or a waste of space. And though it might not make the stars go blind, this sauce might just become your new BFF. You probably will not see a sex tape involving this sauce, but that does not mean you won't think about it.